Tool of the Year – Contender Number Five – Saul Zaentz Company

When I started Tool of the Year, I didn’t intend for organisations to be included; it was solely for individuals. But Saul Zaentz Company (SZC), along with the catholic church (to come) has made the list.

So why has SZC made our list of pure unadulterated dickheads? Because they are trying to sue an English pub because it is named The Hobbit.

Yes you read that right. A big Hollywood company is suing a small pub for the heinous crime of naming a pub after a JRR Tolkein character. It sounds ridiculous because it is ridiculous.

This pub, based in Southampton and named best pub in the city in 2007, has been in business for around 20 years, long before the films based on Tolkein’s classic novels were made.

But because of the success of the films and they hold the ‘worldwide rights, this company has decided that this pub should lose its identity that it has been built on.

Some might argue that yes, the pub has used images from the films and maybe it did. But in reality, has this really done Tolkein’s works any harm? Have they somehow brought the name of The Hobbit into disrepute? No, they have not. The only thing this pub is guilty of is promoting the works of Tolkein with its customers.

And in the eyes of SZC, this is a bad thing.

The thing is, as mentioned, this pub has been around for twenty years and have not had so much as a whisper of discontent from across the Atlantic. But now Tolkeins works are more popular than ever, these arseholes suddenly say ‘right we’re not having that.’

I don’t know how long this company have held the rights for, but I would recommend the owners that they find out. If they got the rights after the pub was named, then surely the yanks don’t have a leg to stand on.

I just don’t understand why this company is acting in this way. The pub is not only promoting the work of Tolkein but in effect, inadvertently advertising the new film, The Hobbit, for free. It’s a permanent advert for that and the other films, so why are they kicking up a big fuss? Maybe if this case goes to court and the pathetic company loses, the pub should start demanding advertising fees.

But it’s not just the pub. A place in Birmingham, The Hungry Hobbit, has also received a letter saying they have to change their name. Now this café trades close to the place where Tolkein was born and is another clear homage to the writer. Who the hell do these people think they are?

The funny thing is though, Tolkein, if you didn’t know, was British so why the hell should we, the British people, not pay tribute to one of our best writers this country has ever produced? If not in Southampton than at least Birmingham. Why should we be dictated to like this? I call upon the government, foreign secretary and even the European Parliament to step in here. The pub and café are being bullied here and no-one is doing anything about it. It’s time someone did.

But SZC seem to be another scumbag outfit, paying huge amounts to lawyers to intent on making as much money as possible and they don’t care who or what they damage along the way. They don’t care about history and don’t give a shit about anyone else, just as long as they get their money. And they’ll do anything to get it.

SZC, you people are a typical, vile company with nothing but dollar signs in your eyes. You disgust me. The only people who should hold the rights to Tolkein’s work are his family, not you who couldn’t give a shit about anyone but yourselves.

SZC, your corporation has rightly earned its place as a serious contender for Tool of the Year.

May the force be with you, but not if you work for SZC. If I could force choke you all, I would.

Jedi Master Bob

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