Okay everyone, please relax. The world will not end on December 21 2012 as many are predicting.
If you are unaware of this, let me fill you in. There are some who believe that, because the Mayan calendar runs out this year, it means that the world is going to end. Well I can put that theory to rest by saying I have a Mayan calendar 2013. It’s got a nice picture of a Mayan building on it and some very lovely, but clothed, Mayan women.
Having looked through the calendar, I notice a few things written on there already. For example, January states that Jedi Master Bob’s blog will be one year old. They’re good those Mayans.
For February, it says there will be one less day than the year before, while in March, they predict Spring will arrive. April, the Mayans have us down for celebrating Easter while in May they say that the British should not get excited about the warmer weather coming; it will be crap as usual.
June sees ‘those who teach’ looking forward to be rid of the ‘little brats’ for a few weeks, while July and August sees them celebrating and sticking two fingers up at educational buildings.
The Mayans predict that Autumn will start in September and the weather will be usually shit. October we will celebrate ‘scary shit,’ while November and December predicts us spending money we don’t have on people we don’t like buying crap they don’t need. Also in December, it has a note on the 21st, saying ‘first anniversary of making mankind think they were going to die. So funny.’
I’m really sorry about not coming forward with this earlier than now and am genuinely sorry for causing widespread panic and everybody thinking we’re going to die at the end of this year. I feel a bit embarrassed now, especially since it was in a box under my bed with some VHS videos of Star Trek. I am also sorry to the numerous amounts of websites about that have produced countdowns to the end of the world. You can go ahead and stop them now. No seriously, they need. Just stop the fucking countdown will ya?
Anyway, just to reiterate, mankind is safe and there is nothing going to happen on 21 December 2012. If it does, then at least they’ll be no-one around to email me saying how wrong I was, which is more than I can for other sites.
May the force be with you
Jedi Master Bob
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